Neil

Magritte inspired photoshoot with Neil.

Mary

Magritte inspired photoshoot with Mary.

Supermoon

During the moon's perigee, the tides are pulled by a stronger force of gravity.  Today we gravitated toward one another, feeling the proximity of the moon.  I am lucky to have this hobby that has introduced me to such wonderful people.

Nathan

I met Nathan just over two years ago, and we have grown closer ever since.  A friend that you can learn from is a friend worth having.  Yesterday, we spent the day aimlessly roaming around Downtown Cleveland snapping photos of the pretty fall vibes and the City's photographic interiors.  Nathan had never been to Severance Hall, and we were serendipitous to stumble upon a pianist practicing at a smaller stage.  I really like the word "severance".

How to Make Time Fly (inspired by Tom Robbins)

1. Glue pigeon wings to an analog clock and grab a group of strangers to cheer, "Fly! Fly! Fly!".  This option is first due to its 49% success rate; other options might work better.

2. Build depressions in both the left and right sides of your brain for memories of your friends and family to rest in, but build bridges (stay away from Tacoma Narrows style failures) for them to freely travel between sides as they wish.

3. Drink chamomile tea, give it up, and start drinking it again

4. Walk down the same trails as often as possible, memorizing the landscapes so you can recognize when the crops change and disappear.

5. Collect wild blackberries; eat them fast.

6. Cover your windows with stray pieces of cloth in hopes of belying the true colors expressed by the sun (or a lack thereof).

7. Include dilatory tasks into a daily routine to strip them of their negative connotation.  My favorite is organizing coins collected from various countries into piles, followed by turning them orthogonally to the table and counting the seconds that they can stand on their side.

8. Gain temerity.  This is an important one.

9. Count the stamps in your passport, then count the number of windows between you and the outside.

10. Study René Magritte's "Young Girl Eating a Bird" and recognize the meaninglessness behind mystery.

11. Concilate the chips in your nails, the sticker ripping off of your water bottle, your short hair, broken headphones, the mosquito bite scars that cover your legs, all of the words in the dictionary that you may never know. Conciliate that home is inextricable.

12. Meditate on your computer calendar, occasionally lifting it to see what lies beneath.

The Netherlands

Got me feeling hella mellow, ya dig? Amsterdam was way too insane for my taste.  I'm staying in a smaller town called Leiden (thanks Dan), and it's much more of the attitude I prefer.  The Netherlands appears to be constructed of tiny rivers and canals that pass through towns in infinitely expanding circles (or so it feels).  The buildings are mostly brick, sometimes painted white, with the massive windows highlighted by pitch black or beet red.  This place is hard to describe.  It feels like it should always be autumn here.  The Hague is fantastic, and discovering that their coffeeshops aren't really coffeeshops was a serendipitous surprise (thanks again Dan).

Paris III

Today and I went to Pompidou and Palais du Tokyo.  Woah.  Pompidou has at least 4 galleries, each offering something completely different.  Currently, René Magritte is being featured and... holy shit.  I feel so inspired.  He takes inspiration from classic philosophers like Pliny the Elder, and uses recurring motifs such as caves, curtains, and chairs.  I much prefer philosophical art to political/social art.  I relate to it more and find that I often share the artists' inspiration.  

Palais du Tokyo was shocking.  I read nothing about it beforehand, and went per recommendation of Nathan (thanks Nathan).  Upon entering through a shade a beaded strings, you are greeted by a stranger who asks, "ce qui est l'énigme?", or in english, "what is the riddle?".  Based on your response, they choose a direction to send you in.  The lower level is a mostly empty warehouse with a male and female being intimate in slow motion in the middle of the room.  There are various rooms to enter with different forms of light/sound performance art.  The most interesting piece is about progress.  You are greeted by a child who asks, "what is progress?".  After a few minutes of talking with this child, who you are constantly walking with, you are passed off to a young adult who you will continue the conversation with, still walking.  Next, you will engage in conversation with an adult and finally an old man.  By the completion of the piece, you have walked through a number of rooms and down a staircase (I am guessing the downward motion symbolizes death).  The old man left me with the maxim, "keep good company".  

Paris II

Most of these photos are from Montmartre/the 9th. It would be fun to walk around this area at night, but it feels dangerous.

Paris

My back hurts from my camera bag, and my feet hurt from walking miles and miles but DAMN it's worth it.  Paris has too many secrets for me to discover in such little time.  

Praha

Prague might make your eyes burn.  The sky is usually cloudy but the buildings are bright white pastels.  I was hosted by my good friend Karolina who I haven't seen since before she moved to Prague, over a year ago.  It's nice to reconnect with people when the connection is easy and familiar.  Karolina and Honza were great hosts and cooked gourmet style meals over the weekend.

The Black Forest

Spent the day hiking the Black Forest and driving through it's smallest towns with my Mom.

Berlin II/Eric

I traveled 45 minutes by train in the wrong direction.  Eric saw it as an opportunity to wander around and clear his head.  We drank Czech beers, and I said my final auf wiedersehen to this city.  Now, I am feeling a bit heartbroken.  Too soon to say goodbye.  

Berlin

Like my sweet little pigeons, I must have been made anosmic, because the smell of Berlin felt totally novel (yet, somehow familiar).  My nose smelled love before my brain made the connection.  I must learn German, for real this time.  I must come back.  Berlin, your parties, your style, your architecture, your store fronts have captured me.  

Semantikos

In an attempt to write a personal statement for a grant application, I have recognized my affinity for semantics.  Semantics is a stunning word without the associated definition.  I feel that I am so drawn to Tom Robbins' novels because they are giant semantic stories.  He attempts to give meaning to the facts and stories that we have accepted by recreating them in an erotic way.  In Another Roadside Attraction, the sign that advertises the roadside zoo explicitly mentions "the meaning of meaning".  I love to discover the reappropriation of words and linguistics.  Often I look up the definition of a word and attempt to use it in its most primitive meaning, which sometimes can refer to its Latin roots.  (Too bad my four years of High School Latin are unsupportive.)  My aside brings me to a dramatic ironic claim.  Tom Robbins also includes a number of asides in his stories.  I am not sure if I began doing that in my writing after reading Still Life with Woodpecker a year and a half ago (which BTW influenced the title of this blog).  I believe that he includes such literary devices to provide another layer of semantics.  Robbins frequently uses long discussions amongst characters to make his point.  He provides narrative explanation of some of these points by reiterating where a character has substantiated their claim to avoid any incorrect or confounded conclusion by the reader.  Not sure where I am going with this post.  I think I was just trying to kill time before lunch (to avoid any confusion).

Terra Pyro Flower Pow Wow

I don't even have a good story for these photos.  The train to the city is going to be under construction for the rest of the month, and it is raining outside, and it's Sunday..... So, here I am.  I need to practice patience with photography.  I am too sloppy and lazy.  I want to work on taking fewer, better shots.  I made a little studio in my apartment with a map of Germany as the backdrop.  Some of the nude photos are my favorite, but I will spare my mother in case she looks at this.  

Ok, maybe I have a small story.  Initially, I wanted to light all of those flowers on fire, but realized that's a terrible idea in a small apartment (I'll save this for a later date).  Lighting things on fire, or in the pretty term, "pyrotechnics", has always been an interest of mine. I shared this passion with my brother when we were very young and used to walk into the forest in our backyard to find things to light on fire.... in the forest.  Mom wasn't too happy when she found out about that.  Jordan and I used to stay up until 10 to watch Courage the Cowardly Dog.  We also enjoyed watching Spongebob Squarepants and Myth Busters. Maybe that's where the pyrotechnics ideas came from.

Discontinuities

You're in Southern Germany.  It's left on Rossitenstrasse, right on K6167, and the first right down the trail parallel to the highway.  There, you'll pass one then two concave walls beneath the highway.  Climb up the faint carved path and you'll find the third.  The third is the biggest.  You might think that the overhang is covered with cracks at a first glance, but walk closer.  Those are bullet holes.  They are deep in the cement and have gone straight through the rusted support.  Imagine the proximity.  Imagine the number of Jews that were murdered here.  

I'm thirteen again.  I'm wearing a pink dress, and I'm the center of attention while we dance in circles, holding hands.  I quit going to Hebrew School after that day.  Five months later now.  You die.  A few years later.  I've denounced any association with Judaism.  I've questioned my convictions.  

Today.  I cannot deny a connection.  A deep rooted intrinsic empathy.  I am taking those holes personally.  

Duty-Free Feelings

Every once in awhile,  I revisit the pain of that day.  I remember what it felt like to return to school, putting my head down with my arms across my desk multiple times per day.  I pretended to feel ill as an excuse to go home.

Last night, I tossed and turned for hours, teetering between pain and contrition.  Contrition came before the pain.  I reflected upon a finite set of events in my life which caused me to feel guilt. I am a mental hoarder in a terrifying way.  I will punctiliously recall events in my life over and over again, rethinking and dissecting where I went wrong.  Did this obsessive behavior begin on that singular day? Maybe it was so unbelievable that I took it upon myself to memorize the details in hopes of making some sort of logical sense.  

Lying and guilt are a funny pair of companions as generally the only way to remove the guilt is to come clean.  Consequently, the subject of the lie becomes the recipient of this burden and thus is now the carrier of this bag of stones.  

In a forlorn and futile attempt to connect these thoughts to my photos, I have found a modicum of a connection.  The connection is perhaps, quite indecently, the connection.  I look for all of the double exposures of the real world where the main object of focus mimics the details of which it has possession.  I am growing quickly bored of this post. 

Twice

Two months in Germany marks two shooting stars, one ride in an ultralite, one fortress ruins, too many bug bites to count.  I am suddenly running low on poetry, running high on wild berries that taste tart like maracuya.  I can recall a yesterday where I might have been happier, more comfortable, less thoughtful, and it's hard to distinguish if it was better.  Acceptance comes in the form of sleeping on the couch and waking up to night sweats, eschewing sounds that might strike something too familiar, inhaling new smells in hopes of cancelling out olfactory memories.  I am an agnostic at war with my Jewish identity and a scientist who can both identify and wish on shooting stars.  On the first one, I wished for something new.  Maybe it was a mistake.

Tamara

Photographing new people is always precarious, but Tamara was open to my need to have a subject in my photos.  She can identify nearly every tree and bird in Germany in addition to a number of snail species.  We have plans to visit a small town in France next weekend and make syrup from some local berries before she leaves at the end of September.